| What do you want to be when you grow up? |
[Feb. 19th, 2004|06:12 pm] |
I hated that question as a child. Kids are always ready with answers, it seems. The younger ones don't tell you what they want to be when they grow up, they tell you what they WILL be. "I'm going to be a football player!" "I'm going to be a movie star!"
A little bit older, and they do answer the question you pose- they tell you what they want to be. "I want to be an astronaut." "I want to be a vet." The list of careers you get as an answer also gets expanded, since older kids are aware of more career possibilities. Of course, we are still limited by the 'cool factor.'
There are only a limited number of careers in the minds of children. The ones that are exciting and/or you see on TV. What they will really end up doing, Lord only knows. But what's the excitement in saying that you want to help people use their computers and make sure that they can connect to the internet and attach files to e-mail? Exactly. Compare that with driving a truck that plays music out of which you can buy ice cream. Clearly, no contest.
But I was the oddball kid who had no idea of what he wanted to do. A plethora of things interested me. And that was even before I knew what a plethora was. Come to think of it, I still may not know what that means. I better ask Jefe what a plethora is. Anyhow, I loved to read, I loved sports, though I couldn't play any, and I loved learning new and interesting things in school. Not exactly something upon which you build a career. I joined the band in 6th grade, and making music moved up alongside listening to music as an interest, but it's not something I would classify as a passion. I also enjoy making people laugh, but I'm not exactly the stand-up comedian-type. Of course, none of that mattered, since I was just in school and adulthood was such a long way off. There were too many other things to do anyway to be worried about what lay in the distant future.
Up till now, there had always been a purpose. There were goals unattained. Life couldn't really start, I wouldn't be an adult, before all of the pre-requisites were met. When I was in grade school, my goal was to learn as much as I possibly could. In high school I needed to make good grades and take part in a number of extracurricular activities to make sure that I could get admission to college. In college I needed to excel at my schoolwork so that I could get a job that pays well.
Check, check, and check. Well, here I am. I made good grades throughout school and now I have a job that pays well.
Now what? It's not that I dislike my job (though I did for a while). I feel like I should be headed in some direction, that somewhere there is a destination that I need to arrive at, and yet I have no idea where it is or what the heck I am supposed to do when I get there.
I feel like a rudderless ship, floating lazily across the ocean- capable of high speed, and yet without a way to steer. Which really matters not, since I have no idea of a destination.
Where do I go from here? I get back to that same stupid question that I couldn't answer when I was growing up.
"What do you want to be when you grow up?" I didn't know then, and I don't know now. Maybe one day I'll figure it out... |
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| Oh Happy Day |
[Jan. 29th, 2004|05:12 pm] |
"Do you ever get to a point in your life where you look in the mirror and you say, 'This is the best I'm ever going to feel, the best I'm ever going to do, the best I'm ever going to look,' and you think, 'Its not that great?'
Happy birthday."
That clever exchange is from one of my favorite movies, City Slickers. An excellent movie. I highly recommend it to anyone why has yet to see it. Much more than a light-hearted comedy, if you want it to be.
Anyhow. I'm not saying I feel like that, because I really don't.
I've completed a quarter of a century on this earth, and I'd have to say they've been pretty darn awesome. I've traveled all over the globe (76% of the US, and 10% of the world, according to these map surveys), seen places of historical significance, and things of beauty beyond description.
While completing my degree from University I've made friends that will last a lifetime. I've got a well-paying job (thanks to the aforementioned degree), and I get to live and work in arguably coolest city in America (my own humble opinion, of course).
Not too much to complain about.
Happy Birthday to me.
May the next 25 be as good as the first. |
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| yo |
[Jan. 14th, 2004|08:10 pm] |
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Tex is here. |
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